Wednesday 15 October 2008

One of Those Days...

What a Day. And not in a good way. I was hit with the horrible traditional mindset today that disables this country, and most of Africa. It started, very early, with a casual discussion with the headmaster at the school where we are carrying out the sex education talks. We were killing time waiting for the translator. I decided to take the opportunity to broach the subject of corporal punishment with him as it is practiced at the school. Teachers walk around with slim pieces of bamboo and shake it at the kids to move them along. One teacher even has two that he taps together constantly. The kids visibly cower at the sight of them.


Anyway, so, I dove into the subject with as much gusto and optimism as with everything else. I had even more hope since I was talking to the headmaster that had asked us to do the sex ed talks. He even allowed us to talk about condoms (which I took as total free reign and have been showing the kids how to use one on a cucumber). I soon discovered though that he considered corporal punishment as not only one option for discipline, but the only way to discipline. As I struggled to make my case, he interrupted me almost as soon as I had opened my mouth so it was difficult, he had a stupid smile and expression of amusement at what I was saying (typical in men of power here). He did most of the talking and I caught him in numerous contradictions but, even still, there was no movement on his behalf to accept what I was saying. After about an hour and a half, I was so frustrated and could hardly contain myself. I knew I was wasting my breath and suddenly felt an overwhelming sadness that these children have no advocates. No safe place to be. No kind person to confide in. No protection. Their parents are so poor, have so many children and have so little education that they are of little support to the child. They more often than not are the cause for most of the abuse children in this country face. So they leave an abusive home to come to a school that also carries out abuse with no real monitoring. They get beaten if they are late. No exceptions. They just didn't get up early enough. It's ridiculous. There is no punishment for teachers who go over the top. It seems that kids get the switch for even the most minor of infractions. We passed the elementary school and saw a girl of no more than 6 years old getting her hands switched. What, I ask, could she have done that warranted that?!


The students at all levels of schools here also have to do chores before school starts (cleaning the floor, watering the plants, sweeping etc.). We're teaching the kids about human rights and a lot of them are being violated in their own school that we're teaching at! There is so much exploitation and abuse I haven't even scratched the surface.


So, after about two hours of talking with the headmaster I couldn't take it anymore. I was overcome with sadness and felt that I wouldn't be able to control my tears. I made a swift (15 minutes) departure and held myself together until the dirt road and 45 minutes walk down the hill back to town. We had to hurry because we were now late for my meeting with the Regional Commander of the police. Another battle I thought. And probably a pointless one too.


It wasn't as bad as I had expected. I think he thought better than to get into a debate with me over giving human rights talks to the police. I really want to present rape training to them. The police rarely prosecute rape, the biggest crime in this area, and more times than not berate the victim. And, get this, if the victim went to the hospital first and not the police, they won't look into the crime! It's also common and pretty inexpensive to bribe the police into dropping the charges and investigation.


So, I felt that if I was telling kids to go to the police if they need help or see human rights violations then I want the police to actually act as they should. So, the Commander told me I have to write a letter and then he'll decide. My fingers are tightly crossed but I am now not as convinced as I once was that I can make it happen. At least he didn't say no right away so there is always hope.


I am trying to keep my spirits up but the realities of life here are depressing and I feel beyond powerless. I guess that's how women are supposed to feel here. I'll have a pint and pull myself together because I am so lucky and stronger than that. And the women who are truly powerless need my help. Hopefully, my efforts are making at least the tiniest of impact here. One can only hope!

Monday 29 September 2008

Update from Moshi

Well, I'm finally back in the land of the living. I was completely knocked off my kilter these past four days with food poisoning, or so the doctor says. I woke up not feeling well on Thursday and after having had a few trips to the loo I decided a cup of tea was in order. Bad idea. It made me really sick and as I was leaning over the toilet to throw up I had that awful feeling of fainting coming on. As I was heading for the bathroom floor, I managed to grab the door, open it and call out for a friend. After a few minutes on the floor, a glass of water and wet cloth to the head I was able to catch my breath. By the time I managed to stumble back to my room, passed half the hostel who had come over to help, a cab had arrived and two of my friends were dressed with their bags over their shoulders ready to take me to the hospital. I pulled on a pair of jeans and decided to make the effort to put a bra on. Good thing really because as I arrived at the hospital, I passed a woman in a full burka. (It's actually black and called a sharshaf but wanted most of you to know what I was talking about)!


So here I was. The last place I ever wanted to be in Africa. And after seeing the doctor who ordered blood tests I was having exactly what I didn't want to have done to me in Africa. I was like something not right sat there with my arm outstretched. I watched every movement the woman did, worried about getting anything near me that could be contaminated. The needle was disposable and came out of a sealed package so I felt better. Only problem was it was a huge needle and as she approached my arm I actually said, "Dude, don't you have anything smaller?" To which she replies, "This is the smallest needle we have." The girls that came with me started laughing. I suppose I was lucky to get a sterilized needle at all! It was a quick process and in my delirious mood I had forgotten all the details so had a bit of a panic attack last night at the hostel and had to look up HIV and Hepatitis transmission information. What can I do in any case? Can't pay fear a dividend as my mum always says!


After the blood test came the stool sample. I thought, oh no, this is going to be so awful, thinking it would be a process of the doc inserting a swab or something "you know where" and taking it to the lab. No, no, no! This is Africa after all. Out walks the lab tech with one of those black camera film cases with the grey lids (for all of us old enough to remember when digital cameras were a thing of the future). She puts it down in front of me and I laugh, "what the hell am I supposed to do with that?!" Her colleague giggles and she takes the camera case away bringing back a slightly bigger official looking sample jar thing and places it in front of me. Again, but this time to myself, I ask, "What the hell do I do with that?!" The reality of what the next ten minutes is going to be like makes me feel even worse and although I've had awful diarrhea all morning I don't feel the urge. Of course. I ask for rubber gloves - which they had, thank the Universe - and I shuffle off to the bathroom. The experience lasted no longer than 5 minutes and wasn't as traumatic as I had expected. Thank the Universe again! This time for all things celestially aligning at that exact moment to help guide "things" exactly where they were meant to go! Enough said!


Results came back quickly and it turns out that my body was fighting a bad infection which the doctor thought was food poisoning. So after waiting for my prescriptions and re-hydration fluid, we all hopped in a cab back to the hostel where I climbed into bed and didn't come out of for three days. I ventured out yesterday for an hour and was back in bed as soon as I got back. I had set my goal a bit too high. I am feeling worlds better today, just a bit weak and tired, but I expect to be as good as normal by Wednesday. I hope so because we have another human rights talk on Friday that I have to be in tip top shape for!


Speaking of which...the human rights talk we did last Wednesday went really well. In fact, I think I may have found my calling. I was a bit nervous beforehand because I never was much of a "kids person" (except for my adorable, brilliant and beautiful neice!) and also because I didn't know how I would do with the whole presentation thing. Doing a board room presentation is much different than talking about rape and domestic violence to a bunch of kids who experience this on a daily basis. I did the introduction and as I began my entire being was engulfed in a wave of adrenaline. During my piece outlining the rest of our talk, I actually felt a knot in my throat when touching upon the women's rights issues. I couldn't believe I was actually in Africa, talking about issues I am vehemently passionate about to a group of young people that may have gotten some of what I was saying. It wasn't all about the feeling of me presenting to them, but more about getting them to think and question and talk to each other. It was fun to initiate a thought and ask facilitating questions and then sitting back and listening to what came out of them. I am now seriously considering going back to school for my PhD. I wouldn't want to teach English or Geography to young students. I'm thinking more about being a college professor in the human rights genre. Being able to inspire young adults to think outside the box, to travel, to volunteer, or even to do research abroad would be amazing. I'm not familiar with the American higher education situation so if you know anyone who I should talk to or things I should be doing please let me know. I'm sure it's not a simple process so I still plan to come back a get a job but I am definitely going to move forward with this. Being able to be as loud and as passionate as I want in that medium is a perfect fit for me. And actually being able to possibly inspire people is a dream come true! Not to mention, and I'm sure most of you'll appreciate, me being my loud passionate self away from the dinner table!

So, here's to more good times (and no more bad) in Moshi!

This blog entry is dedicated to Amy and Ren from Hostel Hoff who went out of their way to take of me and held my hand through the whole stool sample trauma - all the way up to the bathroom door anyway! Definitely friends for life! Thanks girls - I owe you!!

Saturday 13 September 2008

Volunteering Here I Come!

I will be starting in a volunteer position on Monday with a project here called Minjeni. They have three departments/focal areas; Health, Orphans and Women. I'll be working with the women. Right now it sounds like we will be carrying out a series of sex ed and human rights seminars. I'm not sure at this point what other work I will be doing. What can be outlined depends on the director of the individual sites but I already know that I'm going to break the rules if condoms are not to be discussed. I'll break the rules until I get reprimanded and then just claim ignorance.

It's pretty open and volunteers can, if they have the desire and wherewithal, to implement any number of programs. I'm working mainly with two other volunteers, Amy, who I share a room with and Evelinn, a woman who has been here multiple times and is very much a driving force in this project. I like them both and really look forward to working with them. The villages we go to look amazing and on a clear day I will have one hell of a view - right over Mt. Kilimanjaro!

It's only been a week but I like it here. The people at the hostel are really mellow. A big group of us went out last night and it was a blast. We went to a local nightclub that actually played good music and it was such a release to be able to dance like a mad woman. The only down side was towards the end of the night a group of dancers came out for their "international" dancers show. Turns out it was a group of six Kenyans scantily dressed shaking their bums! The three women had very little more on than a bikini and a thong one at that. It was not my thing and I have to admit I thought it was degrading. We all snuck out after a bit. Not the way I would have liked to end the night but all in all it was a great night.

Dona arrived today. It was good to see her and have my traveling buddy back. It nice to have her see where I'm going to be for the next couple of months. She's heading home on Wednesday and dreaming about Taco Bell. I have to admit, I would kill for regular taco. I'm also craving In N Out, Round Table, Beach Hut Deli Nachos, Rich's ribs, and, of course, chili cheese dip. I'll have to throw a welcome back party for myself and everyone can bring a classic dish that I've missed so much. Don't worry, I'm starting the list now!

Wednesday 10 September 2008

Another Religious Thought

I keep thinking of the old joke that goes..."There is a flood in a small town. A man climbs on his roof to avoid the rising waters. He prays, 'Dear Lord, please save me from this rising water.' A moment later a man in a boat comes along and says, 'Jump in and I can save you from drowning." To which the man replies, 'No, if God wants me to live he will save me.' So the man in the boat, shocked, continues on his way to help others. Then a helicopter comes along just as the man's feet begin to get consumed by the water. The helicopter pilot shouts down, 'Quick, grab the rope and I can save you from the rising water.' Again the man replies, 'No, if God wants me to live he will save me.' Eventually the water rise above the man's head and he drowns. When he comes face to face with God he asks, 'God, I have been dedicated to you my whole life and sacrificed much in your name. Why did you not save me?' God looks at it with a look of puzzlement and responds, 'What do you mean? I sent you a boat and a helicopter!'

You may think I'm nuts for comparing this joke to the situation here but, if you are a believer, God gave humans intelligent. He made us curious, explorers, discoverers. He made us (at least some) scientists. Ultimately, it could be argued he made us be able to fight and protect ourselves against diseases. So, what will God say when many meet him and say, 'God, I have been dedicated to you my whole life and sacrificed much in your name. Why did you not save me?' Will he reply like the joke, 'What do you mean? I provided you with all that you needed to protect yourself - vaccinations, medicines, and even condoms!' (Condoms, in this case, being the proverbial boat)

Why are people so afraid of sex and, more specifically, contraception? I don't know. Its such a crazy world.

Please provide comments. I'm interested to hear your thoughts, no matter what they are.

Tuesday 9 September 2008

Personal Update...

As most of you can imagine, particularly from reading these postings, I have been having an amazing trip. I have seen and experienced more than I could have dreamed of from my bed back in California. It truly has been a trip of a lifetime - in more ways than I had expected.

I have dreamt of traveling and volunteering in Africa for as long as I can remember and as such I thought I would fall in love with the continent as soon as my feet touched the soil. Other than a fleeting moment in Rwanda, I haven' felt that. Don't get me wrong, Africa is incredible and the people are some of the most beautiful I have ever met. I just didn't feel the way I thought I would.

Originally, I thought of this trip as more of a career move - wanting to transition into a career with an international aid slant. This vision has been drastically changed after having experienced so much in the past two months. I have been completely disenchanted with large aid organizations here in addition to the overwhelming pervasiveness of fundamentalist religion. Charity and foreign office compounds sound more like the fraternity and sorority system (with all the drinking and drama that goes with it) than aid institutions. Westerners usually don't integrate into the local culture and the workers from some of the largest organizations are actually loathed by locals.

The religious institutions here are many and their messages are relatively similar, extremely conservative and absolutely damaging to society here. It is unfathomable to me how "missionaries" can come here, see the poverty, the difficulties of basic life here and still preach what they do - "abstinence only" in a society, like the rest of the world, where sex is natural and going to happen regardless of how many times you tell a person its a sin. They also say no contraception when you are married. Women here have a child clinging to their skirt, one stuck to their back and another growing in her belly. The men, generally, have very little, if nothing at all, to do with raising the children. The women therefore must take care of the babies themselves not to mention their husbands. It is not only socially irresponsible but economically devastating. These families have barely enough to feed husband and wife, let alone 5-8 kids! We're talking food. You can forget about educating these children and providing them with an even remotely viable future. This isn't good for the children, the families, the villages and the countries of Africa. The ignorance the religious right are pushing here is criminal. The sheer number and sheer blindness of these people is overwhelming and I feel for the first time in my life where my abilities are concerned, defeated. The religious groups are like ants here, thousands of them marching along their little ant trail unwilling or unable to see the harsh reality that is all around them. What can I do as one little person against this mass of self-righteous blind ignorance?

In addition to all of this, I thought that this trip was something I wanted, and needed, to do myself. What I've felt over the last couple of months, however, has been quite different. I can see being able to stay here long-term if I settled down with my own place, my own kitchen and some basic comforts. Thing thing is though, I don't want to settle down into a life without Richard. Its the first time in my life that I have felt this way and, to be honest, have been finding it confusing, to say the least. Poor Dona has been listening to me sort through everything for about the last five countries! She's definitely earned her friendship badge of honor! Seriously though, I guess this trip has made me realize what is important to me. And although I haven't yet discovered what I want for my life, I am checking of the list things that I don't.

To settle down anywhere would require earning a living and as a British citizen, USA resident I am limited to where and how I earn money. I need to become an American citizen if I am to seriously consider working in another country.

So, with all the above in consideration, I have decided, and booked flights, home in mid-November. I don't have any definite plans (of course!) but am going to apply for my citizenship and hopefully get an interesting job. I still hope that my time and experience here leads to a job in the international realm but I suppose that is for the universe to decide. :)

I am currently in Moshi and going to visit the different projects tomorrow. I'm really excited about being in one place for awhile and getting to know a place and the people. The hostel is great and the people seem really cool. I'm off to dinner now but will keep you updated on my progress.

Sunday 7 September 2008

Update from Tanzania

We all know I am terrible at updating this blog, so, I'm going to recommend you read Dona's blog. She writes in her journal daily and transcribes that onto her blog. When we don't get to the internet for days or weeks she just goes in and changes the dates to reflect her journal entries. She is also a much better writer than I am. Trust me, wait until you read her stuff. Check it out at www.donastravels.blogspot.com

So, having not written in weeks, I am going to work backwards. We are currently in the very small town of Babati in Tanzania. Dona had met someone who runs a tourism company out of Dar es Salaam and is chief of police here. We are surrounded by national parks here and went on a safari yesterday to Tarangire National Park which, during this time, has the highest concentration of wild animals than any other park. It is also the one less frequented by tourists so is much less crowded than the others. It was amazing. As soon as we entered the park we drove into a group of zebras. There were hundreds in the park so they were a common site throughout the day. We saw elephants, giraffes, wart hogs, buffalo, impalas, ostriches, and a whole host of other animals that I can't remember at the moment. The most exciting part of the day were the lions. We happened upon a female lying in the shade of a tree just near a small herd of elephants. As we approached I kept asking why she wasn't going for the baby elephant and why the grown elephants weren't more concerned. Turns out, they were. As we sat and watched the mother elephant went over to the lion who quickly moved to the other side of the tree. The elephants all grouped together at that point with the little ones in the middle of the pack. The mother elephant stomped towards the lion who jumped away and started walking towards us. As the lion did so the elephant let out an almighty noise. It was incredible. The lion moved along side our truck and I could see her chin was bloody - maybe an earlier lunch? As she passed she made a small growling noise. All the while the group of elephants never broke. We didn't stay around long enough to see what else happened but it was incredible. Got it on video too! On the way out of the park we passed a few more lions that were lounging in the sun. They are truly incredible animals and to see them in the wild is wonderful. It was definitely in the top five highlights of trip.

Also ranking in the top five was our recent trip to Zanibar. It was where we spent the last week. Zanibar is a fantastic blend of cultures and history. It has a very strong Islamic base because of the Arabs that settled there and set it up as a major trade hub. It is famous particularly for the slave trading that took place. The Arabic culture is combined with the Swahili culture and offers unique traditions, food and atmosphere because of it. We arrived on the island a couple of days before the start of Ramadan and it was interesting to see how everyone had to respect those specific traditions. We couldn’t even drink water in public during the day. Other than the amazing architecture, food, and shopping, the true highlight for us was swimming with dolphins. And I don’t mean, going to Sea World, putting on a life vest and jumping into a tank. I mean, hopping into a small fishing boat grabbing some snorkel gear and heading out to the open ocean. It didn’t take long to find a pod of dolphins. You could see their fins and backs pop up out of the water. I was a little scared at first but with the men frantically yelling at us to get in the water I didn’t have too much time to think about that. Once in the water and able to see below the surface was like a little kid squealing with excitement. There was about 16-20 dolphins all swimming around and under us. They were smaller than the dolphins we have in sea world but just as beautiful and elegant. They would swim with us and then go off deeper into the ocean. The tides are crazy on the east coast of Zanibar and low tide goes out for what seems like miles. The tide was going at during our trip so the dolphins were heading to deeper water. When they did this we would have to climb back in the boat and the driver would frantically chase them, yelling at us to go when the time was right. On one of our last interactions with the dolphins there was a group on the bottom, about 30-40 ft down. It looked like one had caught a fish and was eating it. About eight other dolphins gathered round too and it looked almost like a feeding frenzy you see with sharks but without the intensity. Eventually, I realized that a few of them were bringing the fish up to the surface and when it got closer I could tell it was a blow fish and they were playing with it! They were using it as a balloon almost, each taking a turn to gently push it up towards it. They brought the blow fish within a few feet of us. It was amazing and I was laughing into my snorkel. I’m sure them men on the boat thought I was psychotic listening to the cackles coming from below the water. I’ve never felt such amazement in my life. Dolphins are so intelligent and playful. I could have spent hours in the water with them. Unfortunately, it was cold and they kept going out into deeper water. We felt like we were hunting them so decided to let them be and go into shore a snorkel among the coral. It was one of the most amazing things I have ever done.

Our time before Zanibar was really all about traveling to get to Dar es Salaam from Mozambique. That actually took us a bit more time than we expected. We crossed at one of the most remote border crossings from Mozambique and getting there would have been near impossible had it not been for the kindness of some South Africans. We hitch hiked from Pemba and were lucky enough to be picked up by a group of SA guys. They took us up to there “compound” in Mocimboa do Praia and offered us a room to stay. They were with an oil company that had a place there but their main camp was in a place called Palma – where we were heading to cross the border. They said they would arrange for a truck to take us there in the morning. We paid for nothing – even the huge meal they had the cooks prepare for us. When we were dropped off in Palma, we sat waiting for a ride to the border but after an hour with no luck we began to realize it would be more difficult than we first thought. One SA guy stopped and told us although he wasn’t going to the border if we were still here when he got back he would arrange something for us. In the meantime, he suggested we go to the oil company main camp and ask them if anyone was going. So, Dona headed over and about 10 minutes later she came around the corner and gave me the thumbs up.

Turned out there were 3 very bored SA guys who agreed to take us – and more importantly, their boss agreed to let them use the truck. Lucky thing for us because the road to the border was a dirt track that required the truck to be in 4 wheel drive the whole time. It took us about an hour and half to get there. Once there, we had to take a canoe across a large river. It was a comical experience. The ferry had sunk the week prior so we had no option but to go with the canoe/paddle option. Now, the clever thing is that when you cross over, the immigration office is 5 km down a dirt road. There was no organized transport. Luckily, we had spotted some vehicles along the river as we were crossing so we walked along the river to the vehicles. We asked one man if he could take us and he said yes, popped out of the truck and walked over to a huge bus, hopped in a revved up the engine. Dona and I looked at each other with amusement because the guy had passed about 10 smaller vehicles. Oh well, it was a ride. Turns out that it was a contracted bus for the oil guys. Didn’t know they would be so helpful to us. So we got to the immigration office, hitched a ride to the next town, traveled to every bank in this town to get money out and had one of the best dinners I’ve had all trip – fried chicken and garlic mashed potatoes.

I’d like to note that from our experience here I find South Africans even more intriguing than I did before. We had nothing but generosity, kindness and almost old school gentlemanly treatment from the SA men we met. They seem very open and willing to help and you wouldn’t think a bad thing about them. But then you really get to talk with them and that old school treatment of women is connected to an old school mentality that we are fragile, need to be taken care of, and can’t do things independently. There is also an underlying racism too. Although they would deny it (strictly speaking of the SA we have met on our trip) they say racist jokes and comments constantly. They also wouldn’t think of stopping to pick up a couple of black hitch hikers. But theirs is an experience and history that I couldn’t imagine. I just find them confusing and interesting.

When we were in Pemba, there was a party at the campsite we were staying at. It was the birthdays of two ex-pat South Africans and the place was just mobbed with them. I felt like I was watching a strange world through a window and at times felt like I shouldn’t be watching. It was a crazy night and only adds to my fascination with the white South Africans.

We had a great time in Pemba. Went scuba diving and met some great people - particularly, a couple girls from New York who shared in a couple of good nights with us. Of all the places we’ve been, I would love to come back to Mozambique. I would love to rent an SUV with a tent on top and drive along the coast. It’s beautiful and I didn’t see half of what the country has to offer.

That’s kind of the last couple of weeks in a nutshell. Check out Dona’s blog –it also has links to her pictures.

I’m off to Moshi tomorrow to volunteer. They have a number of programs and I’m going to pop round to each and find out which would be best for my skills and education. There is one organization that focuses on female genital mutilation so am hoping I can do something there.

Tuesday 26 August 2008

Never take the window seat on an African bus!

The new photo is of one of our many bus rides down Western Tanzania. 10 hours on a dirt road will do that to you! I took the photo to see what I looked like because Dona kept laughing and saying she couldn't wait until I saw myself. I didn't get the camera turned around all the way to look at the screen before I screamed and broke into hysterical laughter. Everyone on the bus was looking and laughing as well. Someone even offered me a tissue. Think I needed more than that!

Thought you all would like a laugh too!